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bdjeepers
11-15-2007, 03:23 PM
Sadly, I have not been around much for the past couple of months due to illness. Mostly I've just posted some layouts and left a few comments on others. Now the time has come to say good-bye those of you whom I have gotten to know and enjoyed so much, again, due to illness. I learned yesterday that I did not have a heart attack 2 months ago, just a "cardiac incident", and further testing revealed something much more serious. I was originally misdiagnosed by a non-native doctor who was assigned to me under emergency conditions and who frightened me into leaving the hospital the next morning. I would have otherwise been rushed (and bullied) into a procedure under his "care" which could easily have been fatal considering what I really have, but as an RN my warning bells went off and I found a new wonderful doc who has been caring for me ever since. I have just completed more tests where it was learned that I am due to leave the building in shorter order than I had planned, but that's part of life, too.

I just want to thank my friends here who have been supportive, instructive, and just plain delightful. You have given me too many hours of pleasure to count. My friend Helen Ehrenhofer has been just incredible and a fabulous lady and friend. I have come to admire so many of you from a much younger generation for the good in you; for your tangible gifts of scrapbook pages to your families, and for your love and the willingness to share it with strangers.

I do not ask for any prayers or even good wishes. In fact, I don't want anyone to do anything like that. I ask for nothing except that you offer to others what I have received from the lovely group of women with whom I have become acquainted here, which is extraordinary kindness. I have many plans for things I want to do yet; I only had to adjust the timeline. I am not sad, or angry or anything negative. This is merely another one of life's tasks that I insist be accomplished with some grace, and maybe even a little style. The end will not come acompanied by pain, and I am not afraid. I have made my arrangements, and I am happy to report that I have arranged for some pretty creative and very cool events.

First of all, I am going to continue to scrap but not be on my CTs; I will update my family's history for my family who is yet to come, and I will remember the good times. There have been plenty. I will also stop in from time to time and make sure you're all staying productive, and I will enjoy seeing your creative efforts. I am just going to get a little selfish and concentrate on my own family a lot harder. There are things I must do, things I should do, and things I want to do, which includes learning new things. I may or may not publish new layouts in the gallery; that will depend on my progress. Forgive me for using a public forum rather than messaging some of you individually, but that would not be the best use of my time, and I tire very easily.

Keep up the good work, ladies; have fun, and above all, be kind to each other.

ABitDaffy
11-15-2007, 04:04 PM
Barbara, your grace and eloquence, as always, amaze and inspire me. I will do as you wish and try to offer to others what you have offered: beauty that shines from within.

With tears for you and your family,
Daphne

anitastreet
11-15-2007, 04:12 PM
Barbara, your grace and eloquence, as always, amaze and inspire me. I will do as you wish and try to offer to others what you have offered: beauty that shines from within.

With tears for you and your family,
Daphne

as Daphne said, grace and eloquence. I only hope to be as graceful and I too will honor your wishes. And good for you for prioritizing your time and continue to follow your desires.

hugs, Anita

Helen
11-15-2007, 06:17 PM
Barbara, thank you for confiding in me before this note went out. I have had time to adjust to your news, but I still am crying in my heart for you.
You know you will be in my heart fovever.

You are one classy lady and I have been blessed to be counted amongst your friends. Your note here is as eloquent as you have been with everyone you have come in contact with. Even though we are close in age, we, on the May Supreme Team adopted you as our "honorary Mom at GDS" and you still are.

So get the rest you need, and enjoy the things you have planned to do.

Catch you in hello whenever you are up to chatting.

HUGE HUGS and LOVE!!!!!!!!!!!

Helen

emst
11-15-2007, 06:20 PM
Barbara you are most certainly the lady that I have admired here at GDS since I became a member. You brought your family to us in your layouts and the inner self of you in your comments and so I say to you, be happy and spend your precious time with your family.
Hugs to you,
Elaine

amysum1
11-15-2007, 06:37 PM
Barbara,

I'm sorry, I know you don't want us to be sad, but I am really crying now. I have told you what an inspiration you have been to me and how much I admire you. I was just telling someone tonight how much I love you and your creativity... I am sorry we only were able to be aquainted such a short time. I feel like I know you even more through your amazing gallery, your beautiful family and your thoughtful and encouraging words.

I hope you know what an impact you have made on some of us... your light and kindness shines so brightly. I hope you know that. You are such a wonderful example of true goodness and we need more of that in the world these days. I too will be sure to honor your wishes.

I am so bad with words, but this song lyric comes to mind..."I hope you dance"...that is my wish for you..go dance.
XOXOXO

Sexy__Eyes
11-15-2007, 06:38 PM
Barbara I've only met you a short time ago and I have to say I could tell in that short time you are one of the most exquisite human beings I've ever had the pleasure to meet. My God be with you and your family.

Hugs
Liz

ScrappinBikerChick
11-16-2007, 04:51 AM
wow...in many way i don't know how to respond to this. so here it goes...

and regarding the prayers, i think we all could use some, irregardless of our situation. i pray you will enjoy your remaining time here. i pray you will be able to love your family. i pray your family appreciates what an amazing woman you are.

thank you for your creativity. thank you for your kind heart. and thank you most of all other than thank you for being a strong and amazing woman that we (as the younger generation :D) can look to.

twirlyjoy
11-16-2007, 07:31 AM
I really don't have a clue what to say! you are an amazing lady, and I am not sure that I would be dealing with this as well as you are if it happened to me.

Spend time with your family, take time to enjoy them and pop in here and say hi as and when you feel up to it.

God bless you and your family.

inge
11-16-2007, 07:58 AM
I know you don't want us to be sad and I'll try my best not to be but it won't be easy, regardless the fact we've never met and are miles apart... We only got to "know" eachother a while ago but I will lighten a candle for you tonight.

I admire you're grace. You are a true source of inspiration !

Hug Inge

babyofmine
11-16-2007, 08:10 AM
words are too small right now.
I join the others in saying You are an inspiration to me, and your grace will be remembered.
Godspeed.
{{hugs}}
~Julie~

HollyS
11-16-2007, 08:59 AM
You have truly been such an inspriration to many community members here at GDS and there's not enough words to express the thanks for that! Your grace and wisdom has shined very bright with all the words of encouragement and caring you have shared with us all. Please know that you are in my thoughts!

Take care Lady!
Holly

Babette
11-16-2007, 09:55 AM
When I grow up ... I wanna be just like you! You have shown us the true meaning of "lady." I can only compare you with my grandmother, who was my idol and role model. "Formidable" woman is what comes to my mind when I think of you. Grace, intelligence, kindness - an unquenchable thirst for knowledge from any quarter - wanting to live life to the fullest and experiencing all that she can. Caring about her family above all else - yet, having room in her life for those special friends. Yes, my dear friend ... I want to be just like you when I grow up. To face those challenges head on, strong ... with grace. You have deeply touched many people - only because you are such a special person, a woman in her own right. Know that you may call upon me at any time, for whatever reason. You will remain, forever, in my heart. You are part of me now ... a resource that I will draw upon whenever I lack strength or conviction. For this, I thank you.

Coolscrapbook
11-16-2007, 11:44 AM
Thank you for the memories you shared with us and thank you for the magnificent example you set for us. We love you!

Melody
11-16-2007, 01:54 PM
I don't think I've ever actually talked to you before, but I feel like I do know you somewhat through your LO and comments. Thank you so much for sharing this little glimpse of yourself and your family with us. You are an extremely remarkable woman and I'm astounded by your grace and eloquence. Take care of yourself. My thoughts are with you.

Debra
11-16-2007, 02:38 PM
Barbara,

It is with much admiration and sadness that I try to respond to your post.

You remain as always a wonderful member to us here no matter what life holds. As hard as it is to find the words, I pray that you can hear all of our hearts.

More than that I pray for peace and happiness for you. You and your family will be in my prayers.

Andrea
11-16-2007, 04:19 PM
We all have challenges and you have shown a great example of true courage in yours! Thank you for that!

bdjeepers
11-16-2007, 04:50 PM
OK, you guys, this just has to stop. You have completely overwhelmed me with emotion. I'll be honest, as I have always tried to be. When I read all this, I sobbed. Even DH became alarmed and rushed in. He held me for a long time while I sobbed. I told him they are happy tears, not sad ones, though. I became so short of breath I became completely exhausted from coughing (my lungs fill with fluid) and slept all afternoon. I am in congestive heart failure, and crying makes me get all snotty for real. (You're supposed to laugh here!) It is still difficult to write to you now, thinking about what you've done. From now on, as long as I can join you, I want to hear the funny things, the toots on all your horns, and your achievements, big or small.

When I came to GDS looking for instruction, inspiration and people who shared my interest I had no idea that I would find anyone willing to share with an older woman, first of all. I don't "think old", even though I have been been known to tease about myself being older. I had become lonely living in a retirement community full of those who "think old" and aren't interested in learning or growing. I cannot relate to them, but I was never lonely here.

Now I want to tell you what you did! Every human on earth needs validation, and you did that for me. We all need friends and confidantes, and to learn from each other. You did that for me. We all need self-confidence and to feel that we contribute in some way, and you did that, too. You did all that and much, much more and words fail me to describe it adequately. I celebrate the good and the kindness I found here that has made me a happy and productive person for almost a year now. You gave me a precious gift, which made me very happy, and more, so I only wanted to thank you. Now share with me the good things, will you? I don't really like to cry and get all snotty.

:laugh:

ScrapShana
11-16-2007, 06:26 PM
You truly have brought tears to my eyes. Not tears of sadness, but tears of admiration for your strength and acceptance. You didn't ask for prayers, but I will pray for you and your family during this time. I don't know you're religious beliefs, but I believe strongly that the Lord has a time and reason for everything. Your presence here has been inspirational and you have left a mark on many hearts here. Even with your goodbye post, you have inspired. Hopefully we will all take some time to look at our families and remember that each day with them is precious. Let's not take any of it for granted.

God bless you.

KattyZak
11-16-2007, 07:59 PM
Good thoughts? My house is clean, well, mostly. I had bunko here with 11 other women and why is it that it takes company to get the house clean. When I picked up my DD from basketball and we were chatting about what a simple pleasure it is to have the house so clean. I guess we tend to run with the lived in look. So, today that is my happy thought, for you, Barbara.
I want to share that I read your post this morning and wasn't ready to comment. I really needed to absorb what you had written.
And seriously, you are an amazing woman to write so beautifully where you are at. Your courage astounds me. It also touched me with what is really important in our lives...our families and friends. Thank you for that. You are certainly blessed and I can only pray that I will have your understanding, your peace, your courage, your wisdom.
I will also pray for you to be filled with love and peace and understanding.
You so rock.
And I am happy that you sent that little fella all those cards!

Maisie
11-17-2007, 08:48 AM
Words fail me.
Barbara, you have been a gift to this board. We have learned so much from you. You are such an amazing woman, and I am so glad to know you, and call you friend. I agree with what everyone else has said. Your courage, and grace, are something I hoped to have learned from you today.

Something to make you smile, I hope.

I think we are from the same generation... I have an aluminum Christmas tree, that my 3 year old grandson helped me put up the other day. When we were done, he stepped back and exclaimed, "I made a tree!"

bdjeepers
11-17-2007, 11:14 AM
Hee, hee! I knew you would all catch on immediately! Kathy - you're so right about a clean house! It makes everything seem peaceful and right with the world!

Mary, I am grinning over the story about your grandson! No one but a 3 year old could get away with that and have everyone agree with it! Now, you must scrapbook it - it's so precious!

I just got off the phone with our 3 year old, and I'm so up I could fly. (No, I don't take any of those things.....:laugh:) What good medicine little ones are! I plan to be with him for Christmas, done Texas style. (I'm actually also secretly plotting deviously for a wedding that I want to happen! The participants-to-be just don't know it yet. Two people once burned can make a new match, I know.) :wink:

Thanks - this is good. Very good.

amysum1
11-17-2007, 11:46 AM
I had an idea for a LO, I haven't had a chance to scrap yet, Barbara and I want to share it with you!

The journaling will read: "I have my Daddy's eyes and my Mommy's thighs!"

http://i163.photobucket.com/albums/t314/amysum1/102_2131.jpg

Whaddya think? Heehee... :twitcy:

bdjeepers
11-17-2007, 03:20 PM
I had an idea for a LO, I haven't had a chance to scrap yet, Barbara and I want to share it with you!

The journaling will read: "I have my Daddy's eyes and my Mommy's thighs!"

http://i163.photobucket.com/albums/t314/amysum1/102_2131.jpg

Whaddya think? Heehee... :twitcy:

I love it! Just fantastic, in fact! I've injected humor into some of my layouts which have been some of the most popular, I've discovered onsite AND with the family! You go, girl! And yes! You got a belly laugh out of this one!

amysum1
11-17-2007, 03:55 PM
Yes, the one where your Grandson is picking his nose is one of my all time favorites! LOL!